Good intentions are not enough. They are an important piece of the puzzle and help us to connect to the client’s motivation. Next though we need to help them see that with good intentions, their Attempted Solutions aren’t working. In the first session with this client, the therapist tried to help mom to be able to gain some traction with her son differ- ently than what she had until then.
The therapist helped the mom see herself as a good mom- who needs to change her strategy, instead of a bad mom. She also helped mom see that she needed to separate herself from dad, while it is understandable that she is intimidated by dad, it makes it harder for her son to connect with what he needs to do in a productive way.
Mom came into this session aware of what it looks like to be stronger, how to create space from her husband who hits her son and some awareness of what isn’t working- despite good intentions.
Our session 1 is also available and we hope you read it first. This paragraph is a refresher for those of us who benefit from a summary, however the summary is not a substitute for reading the transcript of the session.
In this session case you will see the principals of the model. Motivation and how we stay connected to the client’s motivation. You will also see how we define the problem. Specifically, how we gather descriptions instead of explanations. You will also see descriptions of the attempted solution and the therapist helping the client to better categorize her attempts so she can avoid what doesn’t work like it is poison.
Even more important is the therapist’s use of the client’s lens, language and position. She does this by how she frames her son and his current difficulty as needing to learn independence and find himself. She also uses familiar metaphors that allow her to connect the intervention to some resources that the client already recognizes and to experiences that are exceptions to the problem interaction.
The therapist also makes the actionable steps doable and very clear. She builds in a structure so that the mom is able to meta communicate which also gives the mom strength and distinguishes her from dad.
